It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
