I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
