yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
