All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
