Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
