singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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