don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
my being single is dangerous.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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