fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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