So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
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