what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
