I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
