are you so shy because you have an std?
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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