its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
You took a bar mat shot.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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