You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
