who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
