girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
