so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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