Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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