Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
