last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
