After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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