I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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