I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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