her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
my liver is dry heaving
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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