do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
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