Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
