i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Sponge bath it is.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
