We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
