My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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