I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
