I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
