Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
