I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
