Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Send help, water and tortillas.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
