Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize