We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I FOUND THE LEGS
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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