I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I think people are normalizing furries
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
