do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
