Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
