She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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