chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
