Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
