he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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