Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
