so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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