Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
