this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
