I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
