hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I would ride that face into the sunset
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
