just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
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