We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
